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No Thanks…I Hate Your Kid!

August 27, 2012

Tonight’s post goes out to all the jack-ass locals who decide the best way to sell shit is to advertise on TV with toothless kids. Every local commercial in the South features one or multiple kids yelling their incoherent ass at the TV. Apparently little Billy is a part-time furniture actor when he is not shittin his pants in pre-k.

Who could be better than that? How bout Sweet Jane with her 3-year old lisp and ADHD going into hyper drive, let’s have her read the cue-cards…lol. Some of these kids can’t even read!  Can you imagine the pressure…lol. Daddy’s whole 401k is resting on the hope that little Billy can sell the shit outta hamburger steaks and the local wine and dine.

When in the hell did advertising become so cheap that every air conditioning business is reduced to advertising with kids. Need to advertise a tile, sprinkler, towing, or any other professional service company…90 % of the business owners parade their kids or grandkids in front of you. I guess the strategy is to simply guilt trip the hell outta you. “Well honey we gotta call this guy, he may charge twice as much…but he’s got kids with braces.”

Who thinks of this stupid shit really? A 5-year amateur actor has NEVER in the history of mankind persuaded an adult to buy a used Cadillac. So stop putting his awkward ass out there, You are really just humiliating the poor kid. Little Billy will grow up to beat up on ladies and kick kittens all because you forced his ass to be the   “Mark Em All Down” car salesman.

I BLAME YOU PARENTS…for this type of abuse. To be honest you’re abusing the rest of us with these commercials that scare the shit outta people. Grow a pair and YOU get in front of the camera, or here is a novel idea, let your work do the talking. I refuse to do business with any company that feels the need to whore out their own kids for a buck. In the words of the immortal Pink Floyd…LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE!

THAT IS THE WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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From → DR.Mike

3 Comments
  1. Bryan permalink

    I can’t agree with you more!.. “Gotta get to Gills”. Puke!

  2. Shit is just wrong Bryan…we gotta take a stand;)

  3. I’m not quite on the hate train, Mike, but I agree those commercials are maddening! We certainly have our fair share of them here. The Gold Guys in Cleveland kill me. I’d tell you to YouTube them, but I know you wouldn’t. 😉 The little boy dressed as a pirate hasn’t a clue about enunciation and he nearly takes his sister’s head off with his sword. He’ll be in therapy one day.

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